A few of my coworkers have commented that I "play the kid card" when I don't want to come to work. I absolutely do this. You see, it's ever so much more entertaining to stay at home with a bitchy child than to go to work. Especially when work equates to surfing, playing games, and watching funny video clips on youtube. I'm SO happy that, rather than reading all the comics in my daily rotation (which is my normal accomplishment by 9 am on work days,) I've cleaned the kitchen and dining area completely and done a couple of loads of laundry.
Of course, that pretty much clears out my chores for the day. So I think I might go take a nap or read a book. One good thing about sick kids is that they sleep a lot. Right now, she's watching TV like Vince watches sports. To the casual observer, this style of TV viewing looks a lot like sleeping. However, I've been informed on multiple occasions that it is NOT sleeping. I'm gonna go help her watch TV now. Enjoy your work day!
Monday, July 31, 2006
Thursday, July 20, 2006
Mass Murder
Lately, I've begun a battle with dandelions. They're vicious creatures. I attempted specicide last weekend, but to no avail. So on Tuesday, I got more dandelion killer. I planned my attack for Tuesday evening, but it was delayed for 1 to 2 days while I watered the lawn excessively. Today became D-Day. But when I read the instructions for application on the dandelion killer, I noticed the following line..."Do not use if the temperature is expected to exceed 85 degrees within the next 24 hours." Dammit! It's hot, what, one week a year here? And the planned attack managed to coincide with it. Or maybe it wasn't a coincidence. Maybe these dandelions are better connected than I thought. Mother Nature is protecting them. Grrrr
Friday, July 14, 2006
Let's Get Educated
My sister has a college degree. A Bachelor of Arts in Communication. That means she had to take a lot of English classes. She put a note in the birthday card that she sent to me. It reads:
Hopefully, you'll have new pics of Brendan before you get this card. We were gonna get one of all the kids done, but Katie got a bug bite on her forehead.
Wonderful grammar and structure, no? I realize that I can't really make fun, because my grammar is horrible...especially when I'm speaking. But my degree was in a technical field. We're expected to suck at writing. The expectation is strong enough that every CS advisor will stress the importance of passing the writing exam required for graduation. They even offer to tutor for free if a student feels that he needs the help. Her degree is in journalism. She had to write articles for several classes in college. Enough so that following the basic rules of English would be a natural act. Writing things incorrectly should just feel wrong, even without thinking about it. My first thought was "well, how good can a university in Tennessee be?" But I went there for a couple of semesters, and my classes more challenging the school where I finished my degree. Maybe they have different rules for grammar in TN. What she wrote could be completely, grammatically correct by the rules she learned. Nah....I think she's just too lazy to do it right.
Hopefully, you'll have new pics of Brendan before you get this card. We were gonna get one of all the kids done, but Katie got a bug bite on her forehead.
Wonderful grammar and structure, no? I realize that I can't really make fun, because my grammar is horrible...especially when I'm speaking. But my degree was in a technical field. We're expected to suck at writing. The expectation is strong enough that every CS advisor will stress the importance of passing the writing exam required for graduation. They even offer to tutor for free if a student feels that he needs the help. Her degree is in journalism. She had to write articles for several classes in college. Enough so that following the basic rules of English would be a natural act. Writing things incorrectly should just feel wrong, even without thinking about it. My first thought was "well, how good can a university in Tennessee be?" But I went there for a couple of semesters, and my classes more challenging the school where I finished my degree. Maybe they have different rules for grammar in TN. What she wrote could be completely, grammatically correct by the rules she learned. Nah....I think she's just too lazy to do it right.
Tuesday, July 11, 2006
And another
Dave found the following entry on Wikipedia. Sometimes these things change....so I'm giving the link, as well as the text that was on the page when I read it. Oh, and Dave...there's no way you can be a Nice Guy. The article states over and over again that Nice Guys are intelligent. Ha!
Nice Guy Syndrome
"Nice Guy Syndrome" is a folk psychology term. Some use it to describe an adult male who seeks sexual attraction and romantic intimacy, but only finds cordial friendship and platonic love. Others use it to describe an adult male who acts as though he seeks friendship, but only as a foothold to gain a more intimate relationship. The term originates from a type of platitude said to be heard by such men ("You're a really nice guy and all, but...")[citation needed]. Several dating gurus discuss this phenomenon and attempt to offer solutions for it.
The "nice guy" is described as a pleasant, intelligent, unattractive and highly considerate male and with low or misguided confidence (especially with women). These traits often lead to afflicted men being a very good listener, and articulate and expressive speakers. They are also more negatively polite than their peers[citation needed]. Such men are often frustrated, if not indignant, about their romantic trouble. They may also use their status as a "nice guy" to gain sympathy from the women they are interested in.
According to some, men abuse the theory of the nice guy syndrome to justify lack of interest from attractive women. They counter that these men make no effort to find "nice" women.[citation needed]William Sheldon's somatotype theory, now discredited as a pseudoscience, stated that many of the personality and physical traits associated with "nice guys" were linked. Such men were of the ectomorph type. Some have linked this type to low levels of testosterone.
Friend/lover trait confusion
One theory about the origin of the syndrome is that it results from the affected males having a false perception of what "nice girls" (the women they desire) want in a lover. They usually believe that these women want their men to be intelligent and highly considerate of their needs, and believe they have these qualities. Conversely, they believe these women dislike stupidity and arrogance, abhor misogyny and violence expressed towards them, and place less value on physical attractiveness, muscular strength, cardiovascular endurance, and confidence than other women (see Sexual attraction). On the other hand, the "nice guys" themselves rarely value these traits - prefering to pursue sexually attractive women, over intelligent considerate ones.
This is highly misguided. While there are many traits that conventionally make men initially attractive to women (physical appearence, confidence, humour), when seeking a relationship a women is not looking for a bundle of traits, but a particular person.
When a "nice girl" type friend of a "nice guy" enters into an intimate relationship with any other male, the "nice guy" is often highly confused or upset. The "nice guy" may become passive-agressive, and confront the woman about her failure to recognise his (superior) qualities. This mental anguish occurs because he cannot reconcile his understanding of women with his vastly different experience. Yet despite the disparity, his erroneous belief does not change (see Milton Rokeach).
Despite a long history of failing to get a "nice girl", the "nice guy" repeatedly insists that the problem is with the many girls he has encountered, not himself. Often he will perform the actions of a friend (comforting when upset, listening to problems) and then announcing that women they are pursueing "owes" them something for their actions. If she refuses to date him, he may become angry and indignant and mention that clearly she doesn't want to date "nice guys". If she dates someone else, the "nice guy" will wait for the relationship to go wrong so that he can prove himself superior.
While similar to the Ladder theory, this theory is not as diametric. Men can be on both "ladders" under this theory, even if a woman doesn't realize it.
Sociobiology
The protoscientific fields of sociobiology and evolutionary psychology have hypothesised a possible adaptionary role for the "nice guys" of this theory. Humans can act like the cuckoo - the eggs are fertilized by one father, but another bird raises the children.
A disputed study allegedly found that many ovulating women prefer men with testosterone-influenced characteristics they consider "rough", while those women during the rest of their menstrual cycle prefer men that look like "nice guys". (disputed—see talk page) Some women prefer "nasty" types for short term flings (primarily involving sex), while "nice guys" are more likely to be preferred for long term relationships (which often include child rearing).
Too nice
Another theory is that as a general matter, women enjoy men who make them feel "special," who seem to value them above the rest of the world. As a "nice guy" is generally nice to most people, women may not feel that the "nice guy" is treating them with special preference, as they expect.
Others believe that women may come to misperceive a clingy or needy aura from the "nice guy" merely by virtue of the fact he may seem overly nice. Clinginess or neediness are usually seen as undesirable, even though these traits may foster security and loyalty later.
Passive aggression
Dr Robert A Glover's "Nice Guy" theory is that the Nice Guy's relationship problems are due to passive aggression. He believes the niceness requires the men to suppress the overt expression of their desires, which leads to less direct covert expression.
Dr. Glover holds that the syndrome expands far beyond the dating world, and cripples the Nice Guy in nearly every aspect of his life. In his book "No More Mr. Nice Guy" he explains that "Nice Guys are fundamentally dishonest, and anything but nice." In short, Nice Guys are liars and untrustworthy. By repressing their own feelings, needs and desires, Nice Guys create "covert contracts" and hold other people accountable for their sense of self-worth. Dr. Glover provides helpful steps he calls "Breaking Free Exercises" designed to help Nice Guys take ownership of their lives and replace old, dysfunctional paradigms with new, healthy ones.
Nice Guy Syndrome
"Nice Guy Syndrome" is a folk psychology term. Some use it to describe an adult male who seeks sexual attraction and romantic intimacy, but only finds cordial friendship and platonic love. Others use it to describe an adult male who acts as though he seeks friendship, but only as a foothold to gain a more intimate relationship. The term originates from a type of platitude said to be heard by such men ("You're a really nice guy and all, but...")[citation needed]. Several dating gurus discuss this phenomenon and attempt to offer solutions for it.
The "nice guy" is described as a pleasant, intelligent, unattractive and highly considerate male and with low or misguided confidence (especially with women). These traits often lead to afflicted men being a very good listener, and articulate and expressive speakers. They are also more negatively polite than their peers[citation needed]. Such men are often frustrated, if not indignant, about their romantic trouble. They may also use their status as a "nice guy" to gain sympathy from the women they are interested in.
According to some, men abuse the theory of the nice guy syndrome to justify lack of interest from attractive women. They counter that these men make no effort to find "nice" women.[citation needed]William Sheldon's somatotype theory, now discredited as a pseudoscience, stated that many of the personality and physical traits associated with "nice guys" were linked. Such men were of the ectomorph type. Some have linked this type to low levels of testosterone.
Friend/lover trait confusion
One theory about the origin of the syndrome is that it results from the affected males having a false perception of what "nice girls" (the women they desire) want in a lover. They usually believe that these women want their men to be intelligent and highly considerate of their needs, and believe they have these qualities. Conversely, they believe these women dislike stupidity and arrogance, abhor misogyny and violence expressed towards them, and place less value on physical attractiveness, muscular strength, cardiovascular endurance, and confidence than other women (see Sexual attraction). On the other hand, the "nice guys" themselves rarely value these traits - prefering to pursue sexually attractive women, over intelligent considerate ones.
This is highly misguided. While there are many traits that conventionally make men initially attractive to women (physical appearence, confidence, humour), when seeking a relationship a women is not looking for a bundle of traits, but a particular person.
When a "nice girl" type friend of a "nice guy" enters into an intimate relationship with any other male, the "nice guy" is often highly confused or upset. The "nice guy" may become passive-agressive, and confront the woman about her failure to recognise his (superior) qualities. This mental anguish occurs because he cannot reconcile his understanding of women with his vastly different experience. Yet despite the disparity, his erroneous belief does not change (see Milton Rokeach).
Despite a long history of failing to get a "nice girl", the "nice guy" repeatedly insists that the problem is with the many girls he has encountered, not himself. Often he will perform the actions of a friend (comforting when upset, listening to problems) and then announcing that women they are pursueing "owes" them something for their actions. If she refuses to date him, he may become angry and indignant and mention that clearly she doesn't want to date "nice guys". If she dates someone else, the "nice guy" will wait for the relationship to go wrong so that he can prove himself superior.
While similar to the Ladder theory, this theory is not as diametric. Men can be on both "ladders" under this theory, even if a woman doesn't realize it.
Sociobiology
The protoscientific fields of sociobiology and evolutionary psychology have hypothesised a possible adaptionary role for the "nice guys" of this theory. Humans can act like the cuckoo - the eggs are fertilized by one father, but another bird raises the children.
A disputed study allegedly found that many ovulating women prefer men with testosterone-influenced characteristics they consider "rough", while those women during the rest of their menstrual cycle prefer men that look like "nice guys". (disputed—see talk page) Some women prefer "nasty" types for short term flings (primarily involving sex), while "nice guys" are more likely to be preferred for long term relationships (which often include child rearing).
Too nice
Another theory is that as a general matter, women enjoy men who make them feel "special," who seem to value them above the rest of the world. As a "nice guy" is generally nice to most people, women may not feel that the "nice guy" is treating them with special preference, as they expect.
Others believe that women may come to misperceive a clingy or needy aura from the "nice guy" merely by virtue of the fact he may seem overly nice. Clinginess or neediness are usually seen as undesirable, even though these traits may foster security and loyalty later.
Passive aggression
Dr Robert A Glover's "Nice Guy" theory is that the Nice Guy's relationship problems are due to passive aggression. He believes the niceness requires the men to suppress the overt expression of their desires, which leads to less direct covert expression.
Dr. Glover holds that the syndrome expands far beyond the dating world, and cripples the Nice Guy in nearly every aspect of his life. In his book "No More Mr. Nice Guy" he explains that "Nice Guys are fundamentally dishonest, and anything but nice." In short, Nice Guys are liars and untrustworthy. By repressing their own feelings, needs and desires, Nice Guys create "covert contracts" and hold other people accountable for their sense of self-worth. Dr. Glover provides helpful steps he calls "Breaking Free Exercises" designed to help Nice Guys take ownership of their lives and replace old, dysfunctional paradigms with new, healthy ones.
I TOLD you there was nothing wrong with me!
| You Are 60% Normal |
 Otherwise known as the normal amount of normal You're like most people most of the time But you've got those quirks that make you endearing You're unique, yes... but not frighteningly so! |
| You Are 52% Abnormal |
 You are at medium risk for being a psychopath. It is somewhat likely that you have no soul. You are at medium risk for having a borderline personality. It is somewhat likely that you are a chaotic mess. You are at medium risk for having a narcissistic personality. It is somewhat likely that you are in love with your own reflection. You are at high risk for having a social phobia. It is very likely that you feel most comfortable in your mom's basement. You are at low risk for obsessive compulsive disorder. It is unlikely that you are addicted to hand sanitizer. |
Nothing to Say
I still don't really have anything to say, but my ability to avoid work degrades with every passing day, so I thought I would post a blog anyway. Just to practice my procrastination. These things are important, you know.
This morning, I have realized two things. First...I really have no business driving this early in the morning. I haven't had a wreck, but I could possibly have come close. I say possibly, because I have no way of being even remotely sure. You see, I get in the car, immediately zone out, then suddenly I'm at work, 30 miles away. Second...if you buy a soda at a convenience store first thing in the morning, you should probably decline the brown paper bag that they will try to give you. Unless, of course, you like staggering into your place of business looking like a wino. I don't do well with mornings. Have I mentioned that?
Oh...and I just have to show everyone this again. That's MY man.
This morning, I have realized two things. First...I really have no business driving this early in the morning. I haven't had a wreck, but I could possibly have come close. I say possibly, because I have no way of being even remotely sure. You see, I get in the car, immediately zone out, then suddenly I'm at work, 30 miles away. Second...if you buy a soda at a convenience store first thing in the morning, you should probably decline the brown paper bag that they will try to give you. Unless, of course, you like staggering into your place of business looking like a wino. I don't do well with mornings. Have I mentioned that?
Oh...and I just have to show everyone this again. That's MY man.
Sunday, July 02, 2006
Stealth Blogging
My mom asked me for pictures of the new place. A couple hundred times. I finally got around to taking them and decided that the easiest way to get them to the family back home would be a blog. But then I thought about it, and decided that it might be better if they don't see this particular blog. You never know when a random family-negative comment might need to be made. Anyway, if any of you guys want to see the pictures, here you go. Try not to enjoy yourselves too terribly much.
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