The Cleanup Crew

Right now, Vince and the kids are out back, picking up all the debris from the bathroom project. All the random pieces of wood and leftover tile pieces. Which is lying along the walkway and in the bark covered area under the deck. I was just down there doing laundry, and through the window I could see and hear them. Vince was out there trying to explain to Tripp what should be picked up and what should be left. Tripp was standing there with a small piece of wood in each hand. Vince said "Ok, wood needs to be put into the wheelbarrow. Rocks and bark don't need to be put in the wheelbarrow." Tripp responded with "Ok!" and immediately threw down the wood he had in his hand. Vince asked, "Why did you throw those back down? They need to be in the wheelbarrow." At that point, I decided to come back upstairs and blog. This shit is a whole lot funnier when it happens to someone else.

Typical

Last night, I decided that I wanted the front of the house to be clean. That involves getting the kids to move the crap that they keep on/around the chest by the front door. One of the items lying on the chest was a little flower made out of post-its. It was made by Megan. I told her that she needed to either throw it away or put it in her room. Her choice was to throw it away. Halfway to the garbage, she met Tripp and he commented that it was a cool flower. She gave it to him. He spent about 10 seconds looking at it while walking to the front room to get all of his crap. Then he put it down on the chest. Right where it started. A couple of minutes later, I walked by, saw the flower, and started bitching. At this point, Tripp won't put it away, because he says that it belongs to Megan. Megan won't put it away because she says she gave it to Tripp. The solution? "If someone doesn't put this away RIGHT NOW, everyone is going to bed at 8." The bad news? One of them took care of it, so I didn't get to go to bed at 8. Dammit.

Watch Your Language

My son has learned new words. Ok, he hasn't learned new words, but rather, he decided to string them together in a fashion that is a little different than the original context. He called his sister a stupid asshole fucker. Then he got his mouth washed out with soap.

I've told several people about this lately, but I don't think I actually got across why I was upset. This isn't the first time he's had his mouth washed out with soap. The first time immediately followed him calling me a poopy yo-yo. I'm not worried about him using bad words. I don't think that words are bad. The intention behind the words is what can be bad. I don't want him to say hurtful things to people. I don't want him to lash out with words, solely intended to make the recipient sad. That's no better than physically attacking another person.

He did not get punished for asking "What the fuck is going on here?" the week before. When he said that, I told him that he has to watch where and when he uses that sort of language...but I did not punish him. Saying that was not hurtful to anyone. At least not anyone who was in the room at the time. I'm sure that there are plenty of people out there who would be greatly offended, and I'm all for trying to avoid offending random people. I'm also all for expressing yourself. If "I don't give a flying fuck" gets your point across better than "I don't have an opinion on the subject," I think you should say it. Just not in front of a little old lady who might go into cardiac arrest if she's exposed to the F word.

I expect our impending trip to TN to be an educational experience for the boy. Tennessee...the land of the backhanded compliment. The place where you can say anything negative you want about a person, as long as you smile when you say it, and follow it with "bless her heart." I'm thinking that after the trip, he'll start referring to Megan as "That stupid asshole fucker, bless her heart." While grinning like a maniac.

Hair!

The boy got a new 'do. I still do not know why he uses that pose for all his pictures. I suspect he's in a gang, and that's his gang sign...but I could be wrong.

Do the math.

The other day Kirstie Alley was on Oprah, showing off her weight loss success. Oprah babbled for a bit before Kirstie came out...said that Kirstie had lost 75 of her 220 pounds. Here's what she looks like.



My first thought was "Wow, she's still pretty chunky." My second thought? 220 minus 75 equals less than I currently weigh. But, hey, I'm not on national TV in a bikini, so it's alright. Right???

Think Small

We're going to Tennessee to visit my family in a few weeks. We'll be there for Megan's birthday. That means that my parents will buy actual gifts for her this year, rather than sending cash or gift cards. My mother asked Megan what she wanted for her birthday. She suggested that Megan "think small," since we'd have to pack all the gifts into our luggage for the flight home. My mom isn't exactly wealthy, so the request to "think small" also referred to the price...but Mom didn't actually voice that part. Megan's response? "I want an iPod." Yeah. That's my girl.